Mother’s Day, Ready or Not

Not.

I hands down, no contest have the best Mother in the universe. I love her and honor her, but Mother’s Day is a day that I wish I could go hug my Mother, maybe stop by the cemeteries to honor Granny and Grandmother then run and hide.

I hear beautiful sensitive talks. Often referring to this one talk. Are We Not All Mothers. I feel and see all eyes in pity look towards me. I am grateful for those that love me and hurt for me, but I do not want people to feel bad. I would rather hide. Just point me to the nearest rock.

As I was typing and thinking, today everyone at Church talked about my dear Mother. She is my hero and my strength, and the strength and example for so many others. I wish I could look at Mother’s Day just as a daughter a day to celebrate the blessing of her.

Somewhere along the way it became a selfish day. A day for women to, for me to, compare my don’t haves with others do haves. What was the result? Envy and pain.

I did a search on “hard Mother’s Day.” I was so caught up in my own pain from the day I did not think of the other women in pain today. Yes, infertile women, but so many more…Women who miscarried, women who gave birth to babies born still, women with children with severe disabilities, women watching their children’s last days on earth, women who lost children to death, women with missing children, women with wayward children, women who were abused by their mothers, women soldiers away from home, women for whatever reason that cannot be with family, and women whose Mothers have passed away. I am sure there are other women who ache on Mother’s Day. We do not know what burdens we each carry in the silent chambers of their hearts.

I have always found comfort in the words of Elder Neal A Maxwell. Seth Adam Smith put Elder Maxwell’s about each of us as Remarkable Women of God.

I hope that we each take a moment to recognize our worth today.

Advertisements

About Hope

I am forty year old survivor and a five year old victim of sexual abuse. I live with severe depression and anxiety, and in 2013 was diagnosed with DID and PTSD. My journey is to reintegrate my alter and the adult me into a whole person, healthy person, and one that can empathize with others.

3 thoughts on “Mother’s Day, Ready or Not

  1. You are so correct. For years, whenever I’d see a mother laughing with her children, I’d feel pain and envy, sometimes even anger that I wasn’t allowed this gift. I finally realized that their ability to conceive had nothing to do with my infertility. This didn’t take away the pain, but it brought me peace and gave me the strength to be grateful for their happiness. As you say, we cannot know the burdens that others carry or the pain they have endured. We also cannot foresee the gifts that will come of our own pain and burdens. You have been a strong, positive example and influence to your step-daughters, and this, I think, is one of the most difficult mother roles that exists – to love another woman’s children unconditionally – to show them kindness and patience – to have the strength and humility to simply be there for them. As stepmothers, we have a unique position in our children’s lives, and I’m grateful for that opportunity, as I know you are, even though it’s not the maternal role either of us expected. You do make a difference. You are a mother. And you are remarkable.

  2. Pingback: URL

I would love to hear your thoughts. Please leave a reply.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s