I am finding that Silly Saturday is one of my favorite days to write. I love laughter. I usually create laughter at my infirmities and short comings, I suppose it is a defense mechanism.
One example that comes to mind, is how I get car sick really really easily. The sure fire way you know I am about to completely lose the battle against it is that I start laughing hysterically, and I cannot stop. My step-daughters used to think that was the most hilarious thing. I remember riding on Germantown Road between Hillsboro and Portland, Oregon. That is one winding and twinding road over the mountain. My husband liked taking it fast. My stomach was lost of the first curve. I started laughing. My laughter intensified when from the backseat I hear hear two girls yelling and laughing, “Oh NO! She is laughing!!! She is going to spew!”. There is nowhere to pull off on the road and we did not have a bag in the car. I blasted the AC in my face and opened the window the get the air rushing more, that sometimes helps. Between the laughter at myself, the girls, the air, and we finally found flat ground “spew” free. Found a parking lot for me to walk around in for a few minutes, crisis was averted. Whew!
Yes, laughing at myself, is something I do. I once to laughed much more than I do these days, so taking Saturdays to finding jokes or funny things reminds me to laugh.
Today I am going to share a few jokes that I found that are quite comical.
A Minnesota couple decided to vacation to Florida during the winter. They planned to stay at the very same hotel where they spent their honeymoon 20 years earlier. Because of hectic schedules, it was difficult to coordinate their travel schedules. So, the husband left Minnesota and flew to Florida on Thursday. His wife would fly down the following day.
The husband checked into the hotel. There was a computer in his room, so he decided to send an e-mail to his wife. However, he accidentally left out one letter in her e-mail address, and without realizing his error, he sent the e-mail.
Meanwhile…..somewhere in Houston, a widow had just returned home from her husband’s funeral. He was a minister of many years who was called home to glory following a sudden heart attack. The widow decided to check her e-mail, expecting messages from relatives and friends. After reading the first message, she fainted.
The widow’s son rushed into the room, found his mother on the floor, and saw the computer screen which read:
To: My Loving Wife
Subject: I’ve Arrived
Date: 16 May 2003
I know you’re surprised to hear from me. They have computers here now and you are allowed to send e-mails to your loved ones. I’ve just arrived and have been checked in. I see that everything has been prepared for your arrival tomorrow. Looking forward to seeing you then! Hope your journey is not as uneventful as mine was.
P.S. Sure is hot down here!
There was a captain sailing on the sea during a battle. His servant came up to him and the captain said, “bring me my red shirt”.
So, the servant did as the captain said.
After that the servant came up to the captain and said, Why did you say bring me my red shirt”?
The captain said, “Well if i get shot they won’t see the blood.
The next day the servant came up to the captain and said, “There are 50 ships on the horizon.”
The captain said, “Bring me my brown pants.”
A wealthy man decided to go on a safari in Africa. He took his faithful pet dachshund along for company. One day, the dachshund starts chasing butterflies and before long the dachshund discovers that he is lost.
So, wandering about, he notices a leopard heading rapidly in his direction with the obvious intention of having him for lunch. The dachshund thinks, “I’m in deep trouble now!” Then he noticed some bones on the ground close by, and immediately settles down to chew on the bones with his back to the approaching cat.
Just as the leopard is about to leap, the dachshund exclaims loudly, “Boy, that was one delicious leopard. I wonder if there are any more around here.”
Hearing this, the leopard halts his attack in mid-stride, as a look of terror comes over him, and slinks away into the trees.
“Whew,” says the leopard. “That was close. That dachshund nearly had me.”
Meanwhile, a monkey, who had been watching the whole scene from a nearby tree, figures he can put this knowledge to good use and trade it for protection from the leopard. So, off he goes.
But the dachshund saw him heading after the leopard with great speed, and figured that something must be up.
The monkey soon catches up with the leopard, spills the beans and strikes a deal for himself with the leopard. The leopard is furious at being made a fool of and says, “Here monkey, hop on my back and see what’s going to happen to that conniving canine.”
Now the dachshund sees the leopard coming with the monkey on his back, and thinks, “What am I going to do now?” But instead of running, the dog sits down with his back to his attackers, pretending he hasn’t seen them yet. And, just when they get close enough to hear, the dachshund says:
“Where’s that darn monkey? Sent him off half an hour ago to bring me another leopard.”
Letter From Grandma
I got a letter from Grandma the other day.
She writes: The other day, I went up to a local Christian bookstore and saw a “Honk if you love Jesus” bumper sticker. I was feeling particularly sassy that day, because I had just come from a thrilling choir performance, followed by a thunderous prayer meeting; so I bought the sticker and put it on my bumper.
Boy, I’m glad I did! What an uplifting experience that followed!!
I was stopped at a red light at a busy intersection, just lost in thought about the Lord and how good He is… and I didn’t notice that the light had changed. It is a good thing someone else loves Jesus because if he hadn’t honked, I’d never have noticed!
I found that LOTS of people love Jesus!
Why, while I was sitting there, the guy behind me started honking like crazy, and then he leaned out of his window and screamed, “For the love of GOD!! GO! Jesus Christ, GO!” What an exuberant cheerleader he was for Jesus!
Everyone started honking! I just leaned out of my window and started waving and smiling at all these loving people. I even honked my horn a few times to share in the love!
There must have been a man from Florida back there because I heard him yelling something about a “sunny beach”….
I saw another waving in a funny way with only his middle finger stuck up in the air. I asked my teenage grandson, in the back seat, what that meant. In a strange voice He said that it was probably a Hawaiian good luck sign or something.
Well, I’ve never met anyone from Hawaii, so I leaned out the window and gave him the good luck sign back. My grandson burst out laughing… why, even he was enjoying this religious experience!
A couple of the people were so caught up in the joy of the moment that they got out of their cars and started walking towards me. I bet they wanted to pray or ask what church I attended, but this is when I noticed the light had changed. I waved to all my sisters and brothers, grinning, and drove on through the intersection.
I noticed I was the only car that got through the intersection before the light changed again, and I felt kind of sad that I had to leave them after all the love we had shared; so I slowed the car down, leaned out of the window, and gave them all the Hawaiian good luck sign one last time as I drove away.
Praise the Lord for such wonderful folks!